The music industry has been incredibly male-dominated for so long now. Slowly, we’re starting to see more and more female, trans, and non-binary artists on lineups, but there’s still a noticeable unbalance. A big topic of conversation in the news currently is looking also at the sexism and misogyny in the industry that is so harmful to women. So why is all of this still happening? As a female in the industry on the other side of it all, I wonder how it can be that we’re still not getting it right, so, I’m carrying out a project where I speak to (and celebrate!) some incredible women in the music industry, from all varying genres, ranging from singers to guitarists, to drummers, from solo artists, girl bands, and the only female in the band, to get an insight into their experiences within music. To get insights and perspectives that may not be realised by a lot of us. To give them a voice, and make us think about why the industry is still not always a safe and fair place for the women and non-male artists and workers. This is the first - so grab a cuppa and your favourite snack, and have a read.
My first conversation was with the wonderful soul that is Charlie Draper - vocalist, songwriter, and only female in the 5-piece pop-metal band, Adharma. Charlie speaks very openly about some of the challenges she has faced, or faces, as a woman in music, and shares some real insight into the gender bias that the industry faces. So, here it goes…
How did you get into music?
I’ve done music my whole life, my family’s really creative, so it’s in my blood to do it, but it was in secondary school where I really started to think that this is what I want to do. Anytime there was a concert or a musical I was there doing it and I spent most of my lunch break in the music block, Then I left school and went to college to study vocal performance and the rest is history, and from there I’ve kind of always been doing solo bits, just songwriting stuff, but then I worked towards working with other people - I wanted to collaborate with other artists, and that’s where I went down the band route which has led me to where I am now.
With Adharma, you got together a couple of years ago, is that right?
Yeah we got speaking and formed the idea of Adharma in 2020, kind of like working together remotely, building on the album, building up our plan and strategy of how we want to present - do we want to present as a band, do we want to present as a solo artist but split everything equally. We then did our first show and released our first music in 2021, and that’s kind of where it all happened. So about 4 years we’ve technically been a band, but publicly about 2/3 years.
And for anyone who doesn’t know Adharma you’re a 5-piece band, but you’re the only female in the band, the lead vocalist too. So how does it feel being the only female in the band first of all?
I feel like I’m really lucky with the members that I’m in the band with because they’re always so conscious of making sure I feel safe, making sure I’m having a voice creatively, so I’ve been really really lucky and they don’t treat me any differently to each other - I just feel really part of the band, we don’t even really question it.
But that’s how you want it to be isn’t it - that’s really great.
Yeah absolutely. So we had the discussion as well about do we present as a solo artist, which is what we decided to do, so it’s mainly what my perspective is as an artist and mainly me presenting on socials, mainly me in the music videos which was really shocking actually when they said we want to do all this work but we want you to be the face of it, and I was like “err okay, yeah sure” (laughs), but yeah I’m really lucky that they give me the voice and are like “write whatever you want to write about, we’re here for it!” So yeah, they’re super supportive.
With Adharma’s music then, it’s very interesting that it’s purely from your perspective, the female perspective. Do you delve into specific topics? What is Adharma about?
I guess our kind of tag line is about unfortunate experiences that I’ve had to face in my life personally and just as a woman in general. I like to talk about things that men often don’t like to talk about, and kind of force it into their laps. I’ll touch upon anything from sexism to sexuality aswell, like in the music industry we’ve heard so much from male artists about being players and having loads of partners, and if that’s what they wanna do that’s great, I’m not here to shame anyone, but for women it’s like, the minute they write a song about that, they’re shamed. So I like to play on that a little bit.
It is strange that isn’t it, why it’s seen so differently, yet exactly the same situation but with a gender switch.
From my point of view I don’t give a shit, do what you wanna do - go sleep with loads of people, fine, enjoy it, be safe, fine. It’s crazy.
Circling back quickly - the main reason I’m doing this project is to celebrate women like yourself in music, because there seems to be a bit of a bias still towards men in the industry on lineups, in general, and perhaps especially in alternative music. Recently you had a comment on socials describing your sound as ‘Barbie metal’, and personally, listening to your music, your voice is very much a beautiful juxtaposition to the music. Is it, do you think, that the alternative scene, or the metal scene, don’t necessarily seem to think that women’s voices suit the type of music? Is it that they don’t think the feminine voice suits that style?
I think that’s got a lot to do with it, unless you’re like screaming and hats off to anyone who can scream because I can’t do it and if I could pay money to suddenly be able to, I would, but I just can’t. I think women who scream do really really well because men are like, “oh wow that’s so cool, she’s doing what a man can do”, but the minute it’s like… especially where like I’ve got this fusion of pop vocals over metal, they’re taken back by it, they don’t get that it’s meant to be a juxtaposition, it’s meant to make you feel a bit odd - sometimes it works and sometimes its meant to make you feel uncomfortable, but either way I’m here for it, I kind of want that lightness with the dark. The word ‘adharma’ is all about a sense of unjust, a sense of evil, so it just makes sense to me.
Like I said, I think it’s a really beautiful juxtaposition, it works really well. I don’t know why people feel the need to say such comments.
I feel like it’s a bit like marmite, you either love it or hate it. I don’t think I’ve come across anyone who’s neutral about it which is fair enough, I guess its a sign of something that gets people talking. I do love the comments that are like, “this is Disney meets metal” - if you wanna compare me to a Disney princess, fine, but there’s so many vast ways that women’s voices sound in metal - you can have screaming, you can have a really grungy rock voice or you can have pop vocals over the top. Either way I think its really cool.
Yes, well, music’s about being experimental isn’t it, it’s not one size fits all.
Yes, and it’s an art form at the end of the day, and art is meant to be subjective and meant to get you talking, so it seems like I’m doing something right with that.
Absolutely! So, generally speaking, what’s your experience of being in the music industry been like?
From the point of view in working with other musicians it’s been lovely. The people who work in the industry are generally really supportive and I’ve only had a couple of instances where a few comments have been thrown my way that felt misogynistic, but you can’t avoid that, that’s life, but the public is an interesting one. There’s a real juxtaposition between being sexualised, and then being shamed for being sexual yourself and expressing our sexuality. Often, a lot of the comments that we get about our videos are nothing to do with the music at all, and I find that quite a lot. It’s always about my appearance or just being a woman in general, which is fine if you want to drive traffic that way, I’m gonna take any comment because it’s going to boost the algorithm or whatever, but would you comment on a male musicians art and just comment on his appearance, I don’t know? I’m sure there are people out there that do do that, but I think we just need to take it back and listen to the music, listen to the message in the song. So yeah, it’s a tricky one, sometimes really positive feedback, but sometimes really negative feedback, but then that’s just life on social media and in the public eye I guess.
It is, yeah, you can get all sorts. You’re so vulnerable on social media, when you’ve got an open platform, you’re just open to anything, but you do really well with handling it all. Especially, I guess, when you get your first few negative comments it’s a bit overwhelming.
Yeah, we did actually have a discussion as a band about it - how do we want to approach this? Do we want to just delete them, do we want to ignore them, but then I thought actually that doesn’t address the issue, so I thought let’s snap back, because most of the time, they think you’re not going to see them, they think it’s funny, but when you reply they’re generally like “oh I didn’t mean it” or “I didn’t mean it in an offensive way” and you’re like yeah yeah, but then if you hit back with comedy or even insult them back, I’m not ashamed to say that I’ve thrown it back in their face sometimes, and they get really offended and you’re like, well, take a step back and look what’s happening here. They kinda get a bit shocked when you answer back and to be honest it’s quite entertaining, and it helps me, because don’t get me wrong you can get 100 good comments and one bad one, and you’re going to focus on the bad one. As much as you push and try to block out the negative comments. You can either then let that sit and bubble over in your head or you can answer it back, and I think the whole point of my music is to give myself and other women a voice, so if I can use that voice to talk about these subjects and comment back to them then I’m going to do that.
You said quite an interesting fact earlier that you could mention maybe a handful of times that you were on a lineup with a female artist or musician. That seems really surprising still. How do you feel being in those situations versus the majority of your time when you’re the only one?
It’s vulnerable. I literally think there’s been about 4 to 5 gigs where there’s been another female musician on the bill - out of something like 20, 30 gigs over the last year or so - and yeah probably lets say 5 to be safe, there’s been another female on the lineup, and they’re always really fun nights, the audience is much more receptive and there’s generally a more female-based audience there. Don’t get em wrong sometimes I’ve played all-male lineups and the audience have been really receptive and are like “oh this is different” and it actually plays in your favour a bit because you automatically stand out, but then there’s other venues where it’s just terrifying. Not even necessarily because they’re being negative or they’re being terrifying but it’s just an intimidating space. I did a gig in Leeds last year - I’ve never been that far north so I was out of my comfort zone anyway - drove there, went straight there, and it was in this like underground venue, it was really heavy, everyone was screaming, and then there was me like I’m going to sing some pop vocals! And it was mostly men in the audience, and I was terrified, like I turned round to the band and said “I don’t know if I wanna do this” but they had a female sound engineer (@jodoessound) and she was in my ear saying comments like every time I said something like “this song’s about female empowerment” she’d be like “yes queen” so little things like that get you through, and actually when you end up speaking to the audience after you seen these grown men dancing to your songs and saying like “ah that was really sick” you’re like ahh okay that went alright actually. I mean, I’m only like 5”4 and I’m like pretty weak (laughs) so ya know, I can’t really defend myself in certain situations, so it’s interesting. Each venue’s different.
I can imagine, but as you say it makes such a difference even if it’s just the sound engineer to have that other female presence in your ear. I guess to know someone else is there - you know us girls have got to stick together, but yes that must be quite daunting, especially as someone with anxiety as well it is quite intimidating or daunting to go into a big group of men and just have to hold your own or feel part of the group, feel accepted.
Yeah absolutely, honestly it’s bizarre, it’s almost like a fever dream, you just don’t know how you’re going to be perceived. You’ve just gotta go up there and do the same thing. Some days it’ll be received great, other days it won’t, and that’s all you can do, along as you’re staying true to yourself, that’s on them. I did a gig actually once in Glastonbury, it was a really strange little gig, and it was a really local pub so it was full of locals in like their mid-40s, and I was up there on stage singing about really political issues and talking about sexuality and I said this one thing like “oh this song’s about loving who you wanna love and being unapologetic - you know, it’s 2023, it’s time to love whoever you wanna love, am I right?” And it was just silent, and I said “I’m gonna think you’re homophobic?” And again it was just silent and I was like “okay you’re homophobic, lets move on!” (Laughs) it was painful. So a lot of it I think depends on age aswell. I think my generation and under are really receptive to speaking about that whereas maybe the older generation isn’t, and it makes them feel more uncomfortable, so it is interesting, depending on the area which you go.
On your perception of women in the industry, why is it so male-dominated, why is there such a bias? What are your feelings on that?
I don’t really know why it’s so male-dominated, I don’t know if it’s that it goes back to women not having as much freedom to do things. In this country now we’re in a much better position to do what we want to do because of equality, don’t get me wrong there’s still a long way to go, but in comparison to 20 years ago or even 50 years ago, we’re doing better, so I don’t know if it’s just that it takes time to catch up and that’s why, because I’m seeing more and more female musicians in the industry which is so so great, but I don’t know if there’s some sort of fear or what. Every line-up I see is just so male-dominated and I can’t think to why that is. I don’t know if that’s because they want the females to stand out, whether they’re trying to make one female artist stand out above the rest, I don’t know, but in my personal experience when you work with another female musician, we just hype each other up, boost each others social interaction with the audience. I worked with Dream State last year and that was one of the best gigs ever - we were just hyping each other up on stage, so I don’t know why they aren’t putting more females on the lineup - there’s no shortage! But then is it because generally the audience is more male for heavier music?
But then should that be a reason really? I don’t know. Just because it’s a more male audience, why should the girls not get up and do their thing.
I’m totally with you. Is that because they don’t want to see it, or is it because that’s what people think they don’t want to see. I don’t know, its so difficult, or if you do see female artists on the bill they’re not usually the headliners.
That’s a good point, they’re not are they, and that’s such a shame because there are some great bands with female musicians that could be up there headlining.
Yeah, I do feel like you have to have a bigger following as a female to make it higher up the bill on a festival, because they've been, like, you know, I'm very much starting up in this industry, and I'm very aware of that. I'm grateful for the following, the small following that I do have at the moment, and, you know, it's only going to get bigger and better, which is great, but there have definitely been people who maybe have less of a following who are higher up on the bill, which, you know, that's great for them, but I can't help but think, is that because they're male? Maybe I'm looking into it too much.
That's the thing, you don't know whether you're looking into it too much. You can't help it, though, can you? It's a shame that maybe comes to mind, as one of the first things that you think.
Yeah, and I never want to compare. Like, I never want to be like, well, why are they there? Because it's not about that. For me, I'm happy to get the opportunity and just perform at any point in the night. Like, you know, I quite like going or being the opening act because you can then, like, set the scene for the night, and then, yeah, you can just enjoy the rest of the night then and really appreciate the music. So don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at all, but... Yeah.
Yeah, that's it, you can't help but question everything. It is bizarre. But, yeah, I think the industry is changing, slowly but surely. Do you feel like you're seeing more women in the, like, not necessarily in the line-ups, but even in the back of the production side of things? So, like, sound engineers or lighting techs or, like, even photographers, are you feeling like you're starting to see more around?
Slowly. Yeah, I don't think it's as fast as there are female artists. I think I've only had maybe three gigs where there's female sound engineers, and they've all been phenomenal, and I think photographers, I'm seeing a lot more female photographers, which is really awesome. So I love working with female photographers, I automatically feel more comfortable. Event planners, that's going up a little bit, I guess. A lot of female event planners. Every venue's completely different.
Yeah. It's just interesting to hear other people's perspectives as well, because, as I said, I can say that I feel like there's more photographers around, but there's only certain venues that I've worked in, and I only know of certain people, like, (Enter) Shikari,, they've got their lighting tech, who's fucking amazing. She's great, you know, but I've not actually seen that many female roles within the rest of the team, so it's interesting to hear your perspective as a musician seeing more of the other side of it.
Definitely, and going around a bit more, the event thing, festivals especially, it's very male-dominated, I'd say. More so than an independent venue. I'm trying to think if there's been any festivals where there's, like, a real main key role of organisation. I mean, Radar Festival does, to be fair. There's three of them running it, and one of them's female, which is great, but yeah, I think it depends on the area as well. I think the closer to the busier places you get, like, Bristol, London, Brighton even, you get more females working in production, but it's more the quieter places, like, you go up to Leeds or, I don’t know, places that don't have a bigger scene, and you’re less likely to find it, because they're obviously more, like, migrating towards the busier areas for a music scene. More opportunities, I guess. So, it's where they've got to go sometimes. Yeah, definitely.
So, obviously, females and males, they have different physical challenges, and I’ve noticed that on social media you’ve been quite open about your endometriosis. Has that ever hindered your performance or the ability to go and do a gig? Is there that aspect as well that has been a challenge for you?
Yeah, certainly, like, because I think especially with conditions like endometriosis, you never know when it's going to hit you. You can kind of predict based on your cycle, which I do my best, but you will just have it random day where it flares up. There have been days where I've been performing with heat patches on under my clothes because I'm just in pain and you've just got to grin and bear it, which is awful because it automatically, it's harder to sing in key when you are in pain, but also menstruating as well because your diaphragm is not where it normally is. And it's also harder to get that across to others. My band are really supportive. They are pretty good. They understand that I'm in pain, but obviously there's a difference between respecting that someone's in pain and actually understanding the level of pain that they're in. They'll never experience that, fortunately for them, but I can't help but think it would be nice sometimes for some men to be able to experience that and be like, “oh, actually, okay, that's really hard and we need to do more about that.” Not even just in the music industry, but just in general life.
There's been gigs where I've been in pain, there's been gigs where I thought, “oh my God, I'm going to have to cancel”, and even the thought of planning a tour, I'm trying to plan it around my cycle, which is so unpredictable with endometriosis. It does affect you because I want to give my best performance and I think it's a struggle to not beat myself up if I've had a bad day pain-wise and then I'm performing and not giving it 100%. I come off stage and I'm like, “oh, I could have done better”, and it's like, okay, but realistically, with the circumstances that you have right now, you did the best you could. You did really well, yeah.
The touring thing was something that I hadn't even thought about, but yes, it must be something you feel you need to really think about in terms of planning for that.
Planning everything, like where you're going to stay, the toilet situation. You need access to be able to change sanitary products at any point. And you know, if you're going to go on a tour bus, that's cool, but you've got to be aware that you're going to be sharing with five other men at least. So yeah, I mean, we are trying to plan a tour for this year. Luckily, we're not going to go for a tour bus! We're going to go for digs and hotels, friend's houses and things like that to try and keep it on the cheap, which I think is probably easier. Yeah, it's just all these things that male musicians don't have to think about.
That's it, yeah. I guess again, it shouldn't necessarily be a thing that differentiates us from what it does so badly because you just cannot help it. It's unavoidable.
It's unavoidable, yes, and as much as there will be things that challenge men in health reasons and stuff, there is something about the women's reproductive system that really likes to fucking do the dirty, and people don't like talking about it. Even women, I find, sometimes are not comfortable with discussing it yet, which is really sad, actually, because that's their body, and sometimes if we don't talk about things, we don't understand it, really.
That's so true. It's the best way to get understanding.
I can't help but think how many young girls there are out there thinking, is this normal, this level of pain? I've had endometriosis pain since I started my period when I was like 11 years old. I didn't really speak to anyone about the pain that I was in for years, and even then, once I first went to the doctors, it took 10 years to then get a diagnosis. I think between 8 and 10 years is the average or something, and it could affect 1 in 10 women as well, which is mad as well.
You don't realise how common it is, do you.
It's as common as diabetes. which we have no shame in talking about that. So yeah, it's fascinating. There's becoming more awareness of it. That's why I'm trying to be so open about it on socials, to be like, yeah, I have this thing I can't help, and it means I'm in pain sometimes. Let's talk about it.
It's good to see people like yourself, because I’m aware of a few other people as well who are quite open about sharing about it, which is really great, as, I’ve got to admit, I didn't know much about it before. I mean, I get pain too, but I can't imagine what it must be like for those of you who have endometriosis. I appreciate it’s on a whole other level. It must be horrible. So, you know, even for other women, it's good to know. It's helpful for everyone, isn't it, to have a bit more of an understanding.
Yeah, it's fascinating, actually
You said to me before that you’ve experienced anxiety a lot over the years too. Is that something you still struggle with?
Yeah, for sure. I actually have borderline personality disorder, which basically means I go through a lot of intense emotions, a lot of lows and some very high highs, so kind of the best of both worlds, I guess. Basically, I feel everything intensely, and there's lots of triggers of abandonment there, but everyone's individual experience of that is quite different. A lot of it, for me, is self-image. So a lot of anxiety comes around that, like how I'm perceived and how I look, and body dysmorphia, you know?
So, to just jump in there real quick… To be in a band then, that's quite big, especially being the lead singer and the only female in the band, that's quite something when you're feeling like that, because you are the forefront, you are the face of them, and as you've said, you're sort of doing more of the social stuff on TikTok and Instagram, etc. So, you are really putting yourself out there. Do you find it challenging doing that?
Yeah, I honestly find social media more vulnerable than gigging. Put me in front of a live crowd, fine, you can easily gauge how you're going to be perceived or interact with them in a way. You can control what you're saying better, if that makes sense. People can take a snippet of your video or take a snippet of a piece of text and completely manipulate it to be what they want it to be, or people will see an image and completely distract from the fact that that is a human being. Whereas if you're standing there live on stage, people are going to see that you're a human, you're a real person with a talent. So, a photograph or a video popping up on TikTok that's random, it's a lot, and I think, especially since social media is starting to kick off a little bit for me, I'm really anxious about it. But it's a learning curve, you've got to learn to grow with it, take it on the chin, and just learn that it's probably more of a reflection on them than it is on you.
That’s so true. Okay, so going back to it, you mentioned about the fact that body dysmorphia is quite a big thing for you.
Yeah, I guess, I don't know, it's tricky. The grass is always greener, isn't it, for everyone? People are never really going to understand how you perceive yourself, and I'm doing my best to just be kinder to myself, because I think we are all our own worst critics, and I think that's something that I really need to work on, actually. I've come off from gigs of being like, “that was so shit, I'm dreadful, why am I doing this? Everyone must be embarrassed to watch that.” Then you get feedback from people, and they're like, “that was amazing, that's the best gig I've ever seen you do”, and you're like, what? So, I think the best thing for me to do is challenge everything, every negative thought I have, I challenge it and go, “why? Is there any evidence to think this way?” Yeah. No, there's not. Same with being anxious, I find that helps me. In a situation in public where I'm anxious, say I feel unsafe, I go, “okay, why do I feel unsafe? Is there anything here, has anyone told me that I'm under threat, or I'm not in a safe position? No, that is in my head.” But it's a challenge, it's tiring.
It is, it's really tiring. Everyone has their own challenges. I've experienced anxiety for most of my life, to be honest, and it's mainly been like social stuff, so like, as we spoke about before, big crowds are not always fun.
That’s it - I love music, and I love watching musicians live, but I do try to avoid gigs as a consumer, because I just hate crowds. So I don't go to festivals. I don't really go to gigs that often. I'm trying to go to more.
Would you feel better about being at the back? That's what I do nowadays. If I go to a gig for fun, it's generally sticking towards the back now.
Oh yeah, I need to be near a door, so I can plan my exit properly. It's just having your options open. I actually went to a gig last week, Slaughtered To Prevail, so yeah, really heavy, and I stayed right in the back, and I was comfortable, because I've been in gigs before, especially when you're not that tall as well. People bump into you, or stand in front of you, and then you can't see anything anyway, and it's just not an enjoyable experience. It's about taking control where you can, in a healthy way, I think, is the good way around it.
A massive thank you to Charlie for being so open and honest in this conversation. It’s from these sorts of conversations that we get a real understanding of things that we may have steered clear from due to potentially making us feel uncomfortable, which, as she puts, is what her music is all about. I hope you found this conversation as interesting and insightful as I did.
You can find Charlie on Instagram and TikTok at @charlie.inkspired, and @adharmalive on Instagram. Adharma’s music can be found on Spotify, with new music coming out very soon, and I would recommend “Porcelain” and “Lovesick” as a couple of favourites of mine.
If you’re a musician interested in taking part in this project, or if you know one who might be, please let me know in the comments below! I’m looking to speak with women of all races, genres, musical talents, ages… Anyone and everyone.